1. Identify need for emotional self-reliance
Problems are normal. How do we handle them? (Brainstorming of things that create stress, anxiety, heartache, etc.)
2nd Nephi 2:25 25aAdam bfell that men might be; and men care, that they might have djoy.
2. As we learn to face our trials & endure them, we will find greater internal peace and happiness.
“When in situations of stress we wonder if there is any more in us to give, we can be comforted to know that God, who knows our capacity perfectly, placed us here to succeed. No one was foreordained to fail or to be wicked. When we have been weighed and found wanting, let us remember that we were measured before and we were found equal to our tasks; and, therefore, let us continue, but with a more determined discipleship. When we feel overwhelmed, let us recall the assurance that God will not over program us; he will not press upon us more than we can bear.” –Neal A. Maxwell.
3. The gospel of Jesus Christ does not profess to eliminate stress, and none should think it will, but it will give meaning to the opposition and resistance we meet in this life and enable us to grow “in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man.” (Luke 2:52.)(Dealing with Stress & Discouragement)
4.Ideas for how to handle, cope, --Review & discuss
Principle 1: We are developing and growing.
“When we see our mortal task as one of developing ourselves rather than one of not making any mistakes, we are less likely to give up hope when we confront our weaknesses. Further, knowing that the Lord has actually allowed us to have particular weaknesses so that we can be humbly open to his influence (see Ether 12:27) can free us of the need to appear perfect to others.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
“Interestingly, as my client became more accepting of herself, she did not accomplish less, as she had feared. Rather, as she stopped comparing herself with others and living by ’shoulds,’ she became more relaxed and self-directed in her activities.” Dr. Brent Scharman, a therapist with LDS Social Services
Thoughts brought out in discussion:
As we learn to love ourselves we can learn to forgive ourselves.
Our weaknesses are opportunities to draw close to the Lord.
Mistakes are opportunities to practice forgiveness.
Satan distorts the truth & constantly whispers in our ears
Principle 2: Control—let go of trying to control others.
“As we leave our burdens of worry and fear with a trusted Father, we can feel peace even in times of uncertainty.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
Thoughts shared in discussion:
We have to learn to trust God & leave the control to him.
If we come to know the Savior, we come to know the Father.
Knowing the Lord and trusting in him can help us feel secure & lessen our need for control.
Principle 3: Freed from the effects of sin and sins of others
We need to first acknowledge the hurts and pains; share frustrations.
“Freeing ourselves from the past can be difficult. Spiritual guidance is essential in this process. “The Lord, through his grace, can actually give us strength to overcome problems that we cannot overcome on our own… A competent therapist can also aid us as we try to understand and overcome serious problems with roots in the past.” (Harold Brown, LDS Social Services)
Thoughts shared in discussion:
Sharing and discussing things we’re dealing with can help us to gain perspective. However, sharing should be done appropriately and to someone we can trust & who has our best interest at heart.
Principle 4: Changing thoughts & changing feelings
“Negative thinking patterns cause negative emotions, they can even trigger depression.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
“These negative feelings too often cause us to withdraw from the very people who could help us. A vague and undefined problem may seem insurmountable, but with a little talking and sharing of perspectives it can usually be dealt with. Encouraging your children to express their feelings to you from their earliest years will do much to empower them against these potentially devastating feelings of helplessness.”.)(Dealing with Stress & Discouragement)
“This does not mean that we refuse to allow negative emotions or experiences. But it does mean that we do not ruminate about them and draw negative conclusions about our own worth. The rewards for redirecting thoughts in a more positive direction are great. Depression can subside, anxiety can diminish, and physical health can improve.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
President Ezra Taft Benson has said, “We live in an age when, as the Lord foretold, men’s hearts are failing them, not only physically but in spirit. (See D&C 45:26.) Many are giving up heart for the battle of life. Suicide ranks as a major cause of the deaths of college students. As the showdown between good and evil approaches with its accompanying trials and tribulations, Satan is increasingly striving to overcome the Saints with despair, discouragement, despondency, and depression.” (Dealing with Stress & Discouragement)
Thoughts shared in discussion:
Parable of wheat & tares (Matthew, ch. 13)—the tares were sewn by the enemy while the owner of the field slept. We can liken this to ourselves & see the need to be ‘spiritually awake,’ in order to prevent Satan from sewing thoughts & doubts in our hearts. We need to recognize him for what & who he is.
Fight negative thinking with truth.
It’s important to consciously recognize negative thought patterns. Then we can redirect our thoughts in a positive direction.
Principle 5: Wellness is balance
Spiritually fit, Physically fit, Get out of debt, Change your pace, Relax and enjoy life, Set priorities and goals, Change habits and routines.
Principle 6: The Atonement brings healing
“As Sister Patricia Holland explains, giving our burdens to the Lord sometimes requires us “to make that leap of faith toward His embrace when we are least certain of His presence. …” (Keeping Mentally Well)
“In a resurrected, otherwise perfected body, our Lord of this sacrament table has chosen to retain for the benefit of his disciples the wounds in his hands and his feet and his side—signs, if you will, that painful things happen even to the pure and perfect. Signs, if you will that pain in this world are not evidence that God doesn’t love you. It is the wounded Christ who is the captain of our soul—he who yet bears the scars of the sacrifice, the lesions of love and humility and forgiveness.”—Jeffery R. Holland
“Dr. Dean Byrd, field manager for LDS Social Services, suggests that we can feel this love by reading the scriptures in a personalized way. For example, we could read John 3:16–17, “For God so loved [me], that he gave his only begotten Son, that [believing in him, I] should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
“The atoning love of the Savior includes his willingness to bear not only the burden of our sins—which would separate us forever from our Father—but also our day-to-day burdens of fear and anxiety—which would deprive us of peace and joy.” (Keeping Mentally Well)
“When we hand our fears and frustrations to Him in absolute confidence that He will help us resolve them when, when in this way we free our hearts and mind and souls of all anxiety, we find in a rather miraculous way that He can instill within us a whole new perspective—He can fill us with ‘that joy’ which is unspeakable and full of glory. (Hel. 5:44).”
And finally, don’t forget to have a sense of humor.
“A wholesome sense of humor will be a safety valve that will enable you to apply the lighter touch to heavy problems and to learn some lessons in problem solving that ‘sweat and tears’ often fail to dissolve.” Hugh B. Brown
